A Conscience Cleared in the Western Land

This is a record of an interview with Hu Shun'an, who sought deliverance at the Hsiang Kuang Pure Land Buddhist Centre in Australia. He now resides in the Western Land of Ultimate Bliss. This account reflects upon his life as a government official and later a jailer in the underworld. Recorded by the chief writer, Shi Fajing, on January 20, 2024.

Hu Shun'an speaks:

"Namo Amituofo. I am filled with such overwhelming gratitude, tears streaming down my face, as I kneel before the Buddha alongside fifty-nine other jailers. We are deeply indebted to the compassionate Namo Amituofo and Practitioner Su for allowing us—foolish disciples burdened by such heavy sins—to finally find liberation and leave our suffering behind today.

Every cycle of rebirth is a series of peaks and valleys, rising high only to fall into the deepest abyss. In the midst of this samsara, how much of our path can we truly control? How much is simply beyond our command? Looking back at my own journey through the cycle of rebirth, I have been everywhere and I have been everything—I have even taken the form of various animals. After countless aeons of wandering, this moment has finally arrived. To be able to sit quietly before the Buddha, listening to the teachings of the compassionate Namo Amituofo, and to hear the voice of Practitioner Su delivering Dharma talks in the human world—it fills me with such immense Dharma joy.

A Life of Arrogance and Regret

I am so profoundly grateful for this day. I find myself smiling foolishly, then moved to tears, laughing and crying all at once. My heart is truly joyful. I am so thankful to Practitioner Su for helping so many of us jailers; we are all so blessed to have waited for this moment, and we cherish it dearly. I vow to practise diligently and ensure that Practitioner Su's efforts in guiding us to the Western Land of Ultimate Bliss were not in vain.

When I was Hu Shun'an in the human world, I was incredibly arrogant and self-satisfied. I was born into a prestigious family, I was handsome, and I was talented. It was difficult for me not to be conceited.

Our family, the Hu clan, was a renowned noble family in our town. For generations, we had served as government officials, including my father. Naturally, I was expected to follow in their footsteps, but I had no interest in officialdom. I only wanted to be a dashing, carefree young nobleman.

The Weight of a Father's Heart

My choices naturally disappointed my father, who held high expectations for me to bring honour to the Hu name. By choosing to be a loafer, I failed to meet his hopes. I knew he must have been devastated, but I felt helpless because I truly did not want that life. From childhood, I had never been scolded or struck; I had never even faced a harsh word. Even when I made grave mistakes, my parents were always forgiving. Growing up in such an environment, I lived entirely for myself, never considering others. If I made a wrong decision, I never blamed myself; I blamed those around me for not warning me.

Can you imagine how spoiled I was? In my world, I was the only one who mattered. Everyone else was merely a supporting character. This mindset made me selfish to the core. Even though our family had served as officials for generations, and many elders—my great-grandfather, my grandfather, and all the old officials who knew my father—looked to me with such hope, I refused them all. I showed no respect to my grandfather or my father, maintaining an air of utter self-importance.

A Sudden Awakening

I do not know how many people spoke ill of me behind my back, but let them talk! I wanted to be myself. I refused to consider their feelings; it felt too exhausting, and I believed it would compromise my dignity. Seeing me happy with my choices, my father could not bear to scold me. He suppressed all his disappointment and self-reproach, never saying a word of rebuke, completely yielding to me while he suffered in silence.

I did not realise that my refusal to serve as an official would cause my father such intense emotional distress. Perhaps because the family tradition of public service ended with me, he blamed himself for everything. After realising that no one could persuade me, he suddenly suffered a heart attack one night just a week later. He could not breathe, and within moments, he collapsed and passed away.

I witnessed my father collapse with my own eyes. I was stunned. I had never imagined a day would come when my father would fall. In my mind, he was my eternal pillar of strength; he could never fall before I did. Seeing him collapse before me left me completely shattered.

The Path of Integrity

From his death until the funeral, I was in a daze. I could not eat or sleep. My mind was filled with images of him and the words he had spoken to me. When I learned that he had died of depression because of my refusal to serve, I was consumed by self-reproach. I cursed myself for being so selfish. To ensure my father did not carry his regrets into the afterlife, I decided to turn my life around a year after his passing. I studied and successfully obtained an official position, fulfilling his final wish.

Seeing me stand tall again brought my mother great comfort. She had thought I was beyond saving, and she found my transformation after my father's death truly unbelievable. My temperament changed drastically. Without even realising it, I shed my arrogance. I became willing to humble myself to help others and even began to consider their needs. When my mother asked why I had changed so much, I told her, 'I do not know how it happened, but every time I remember my father collapsing before me, my heart aches. I do not want anyone else to suffer because of me. I would rather everyone be well than continue to be the self-centred person I once was.'

I eventually secured my position. In the government, I stood on the side of justice, following the example of my grandfather and father, who were clean and upright officials beloved by the people. I hoped to be just like them, so I remained impartial and refused all bribes. However, this path was arduous. Too many corrupt officials despised me because my actions hindered their greed. To them, I was a thorn in their side, and they were desperate to remove me. They used every scheme and plot imaginable to ensure I could not sit securely in my position.

The Final Sacrifice

I knew that impermanence could arrive at any moment, so I told my mother to prepare herself. I made it clear that I would never abandon my commitment to fairness and justice out of fear. I would continue to remain clean and look after the people. If I were ever harmed, I asked her to be proud of me and not to grieve, for I had a clear conscience. My mother understood my heart; she told me to be at peace and offered her full support.

I walked this path with constant vigilance, often staying awake until the early hours of the morning, working harder to better serve the people. At the age of forty-five, I was finally framed. The group that conspired against me stood behind me, gloating, 'So, your day has finally come!'

I knew that no amount of explanation could clear my name, for these officials were all in league together. Even those who had previously supported me retreated to the sidelines, acting as if we were strangers. Seeing their reaction, my heart turned cold, but I knew this was the nature of humanity; it was to be expected.

From the Underworld to the Western Land

On the executioner's block, my thoughts were with my mother. Although she supported me, I knew she would worry. I had not expected this day to come so soon. Soon, the sign was removed, and my head fell to the ground. My spirit held no resentment or hatred; I felt only a profound sense of helplessness and concern for my mother. I did not have any attachment to the act of my execution, so after my spirit left my body, it remained whole; my head was not severed. The underworld officials came to receive me and brought me directly before King Yama to be judged for my life's deeds.

In my youth, I was ignorant and self-centred, creating much bad karma. But later, I worked for the welfare of the people, fulfilling my duties with diligence, and ultimately sacrificed my life to protect justice. These merits far outweighed the sins of my youth. After balancing my merits and demerits, King Yama appointed me as a jailer to serve in the underworld. My work primarily involved handling documents. There were stacks upon stacks of indictments, as every person had committed countless sins. I sighed deeply; the people of the world do not realise that everything they do in the human realm carries karmic consequences, which is why they create so much karma.

I did not know how to help the people in the human world. Separated by the veil of life and death, they could not hear me. I could only continue my service in the underworld with a heavy heart. In recent years, I began to hear Practitioner Su delivering Dharma talks, and I cannot describe the joy I felt. That feeling of seeing a glimmer of hope after years of helplessness brought me to tears. I immediately knelt and bowed in gratitude to the compassionate Practitioner Su in the human world, thanking her for bringing hope to all beings so that we might understand the laws of karma and cause and effect, and turn away from evil to practise Goodness.

I was fortunate enough to be included on the list of those Practitioner Su would guide to the Western Land. My heart is filled with infinite gratitude. Today, alongside fifty-nine other jailers, we have truly arrived in the Western Land. My heart remains unsettled, overflowing with gratitude, and then more gratitude.

Namo Amituofo.

Hu Shun'an bows in reverence.

Hu Shun'an's father, Hu Banghua, and mother, Huang Yuexia, have both been invited from the underworld to the Western Dharma-Nature Land to listen to the Dharma."