A Heart Without Regret: The Testimony of a Former Jailer

Zeng Youqun was a high-ranking official during the late Ming Dynasty who, after being executed for his courageous attempts to aid the suffering populace, spent time serving as a jailer within the hells. Through the boundless compassion of Practitioner Su, he was saved and successfully attained rebirth in the Western Pure Land of Ultimate Bliss. This testimony was recorded on September 4, 2020.

Zeng Youqun speaks:

"Namo Amituofo. The gentle breeze is blowing, and I, along with fifty-nine other jailers, am already standing upon the golden ground of the Western Pure Land of Ultimate Bliss. Birds are dancing in the air, and every sound they make is the recitation of the Buddha-name. We had just been waiting in the ranks, preparing for Chao Du, when Practitioner Su called out to us. With a simple gesture, she took each of our hands, and in an instant, we were transported to this magnificent realm. I am filled with gratitude for the compassion of the Buddha and Practitioner Su.

The Weight of a Crumbling Dynasty

Reflecting on my life in the human world, it was often filled with instability and the need for extreme caution. I was an official in the late Ming Dynasty, highly regarded by the imperial court. Every day, I had to attend court to discuss state affairs with the Emperor. The frontiers were constantly in crisis, and the Jiangnan region, once lush with rice paddies, was suffering from severe drought. Inside the imperial palace, however, the life of indulgence continued as if nothing were wrong. Seeing the national treasury dwindling day by day, the court could only resort to heavy taxation on the people. The commoners had no income; their lives were miserable. The court pressured local officials to extract taxes at all costs. This vicious cycle made life impossible for the people, leading to the rise of bandits. Initially, these groups formed to resist local government and protect the people, but over time, they lost their original purpose and began robbing everyone indiscriminately. Hearing of this chaos in society, my heart grew heavy, and I felt utterly lost as to what to do.

A Risky Petition for the People

One night, in my study, I picked up my brush and wrote a petition. I urged the court to practise austerity and to open the national treasury to provide relief to the people. I requested that all large-scale celebrations and excessive, luxurious banquets be avoided, hoping that the nation and its people could survive these hardships together. I did not know if I would live or die after submitting this. Thus, alongside the petition, I wrote a final testament. I instructed my wife and children that upon reading my letter, they should immediately depart for the frontier to find a place of refuge. If the content of my petition displeased the Emperor, not only would I be sacrificed, but my entire family might also face destruction. To prevent further loss of life, I asked my family to notify our relatives so they could seek safety.

At dawn, I donned my most modest official robes and cap, tidying myself until I was perfectly neat. I tucked the petition into my sleeve, took a deep breath, and stood tall. After a simple meal of rice porridge in my study, I pushed open the door. I looked around, as if saying goodbye to every scene, every object, and every tree in my home. I walked to the stable and stroked the silver-grey horse with whom I shared the deepest bond. I named him Fusang. I told him, 'You shall accompany your master on one more trip to the palace. It may very well be the last.' Fusang seemed to understand; he lifted his head and revealed a sorrowful expression. I told him not to grieve, for this was my choice. I led him out, hitched the carriage, and set off toward the palace. With a heart resolved to die, I kept my eyes fixed forward. Even the eunuchs I encountered daily in the palace received no acknowledgement from me. I walked straight to the main hall and stood in my familiar position, handing the petition to the Emperor's personal attendant.

Standing Tall Before the Emperor

Before long, the Emperor entered with a languid gait, sat upon his throne, and began flipping through the memorials from his ministers, even yawning as he did so. When he opened my petition, his expression changed. Within moments, he threw the document to the floor and shouted, 'How bold! Austerity? You want to bring austerity to the imperial court? Are we so poor that we cannot even afford to feed an ant? Who is this, so daring as to write such content? Do you not value your life? You dare to point the finger at the court, implying that the current plight of the people is all my fault? Is that what you mean?'

At that moment, everyone in the court knelt, begging the Emperor to calm his anger. I alone remained standing, straight and tall. The Emperor grew even more furious: 'Does your refusal to kneel mean you believe your petition is correct?' The other ministers were breaking out in a cold sweat for me. I replied, 'Regarding the people, their suffering is something I cannot bear. I have no other method. I have already distributed all the rice and gold from my own household to the people, yet it has not improved their situation. Only you, Your Majesty, can change this. If you show compassion, the people will feel it, and perhaps their lives can return to stability.' The Emperor was left speechless by my words. A nearby official stopped me, saying, 'Do not be disrespectful to the Emperor.' No one else dared to speak, and all withdrew.

The Price of Persistence

To my surprise, my life was spared. A few days later, the Emperor announced that the annual taxes would not be increased. I was not satisfied with this answer, as it did not fundamentally solve the people's problems. After pacing back and forth at home, I decided to risk my life a second time. I wrote clearly, requesting that the Emperor open the treasury to save the people. This time, the Emperor was truly enraged. He felt he had already made a concession, and yet I was still causing trouble. He had me arrested and thrown into prison on a trumped-up charge of insubordination. I was locked in a dark, damp cell to await my final sentencing. I received only one meal a day, which resembled slop. I had indeed brought disaster upon my family; most were exiled to the frontier or demoted to commoners. My body, once upright, became hunched and withered, but my heart held no regret. I had done what I could for the people. For five years in that prison, I was tortured by the environment until I was unrecognisable. No one dared to visit me, fearing they would be implicated.

The Final Journey and Karmic Truths

Five years later, I was sentenced to be executed. The prison cart pushed me toward the execution ground. I no longer knew what twisted shape I had become. The commoners I had once helped, knowing it was I who had assisted them in their darkest hour, knelt on both sides of the street, weeping for me. My heart was empty of thoughts; the years of torture in prison had made me long for death, and now that day had arrived. I did not think of my own death; instead, I wanted to know how the people were living. I looked around from the cart and saw that the expressions on their faces were still full of bitterness. My heart ached, but I was powerless now; I could only pray to the Heavens to protect them. The blade fell, my head hit the ground, and everything went black. When I opened my eyes again, two officials in red robes stood before me. I did not know who they were, but after a few steps, we arrived before the Yama King of the hells. The King told me to repent for my sins. I did not understand what he meant.

The Yama King said, 'In your past life, you were a hunter. While hunting in the forest, you saw a rabbit and followed it to its burrow, mercilessly wiping out the entire family of rabbits, taking them home to share a feast with your family and neighbours. That rabbit you followed is the Emperor you served in this life. Because of that past karmic connection of slaughter, he is now merciless and unable to listen to your words. You were destined to repay him with your life in this lifetime. Your family, who ate the rabbits, shared in that collective karma; their exile to the frontier is their own karmic retribution. None of this can be deceived. If not for your heart to help the people in this life, you would have entered hell to suffer for your past deeds. Now, because your good intentions have transformed your karma, you have been granted the position of a jailer. I hope you will serve well.' I gratefully kowtowed three times to the Yama King. I cherished every day of my service as a jailer.

The Reality of Retribution

Unexpectedly, a few years into my service, I saw the Emperor. He looked much older, and I almost did not recognise him, but the magnetic field of his accumulated evil made me certain it was him. I heard from other jailers about the Emperor's sentence. As a ruler, he lived only for his own pleasure, ignored the people, refused to listen to counsel, and indulged in women. All these sins were multiplied many times over. The Emperor entered the cycle of suffering in the Avici Hell. I also saw the officials who had once fawned over him; they were in various hells—the brain-gouging hell, the heart-gouging hell, the intestinal-irrigation hell, the crushing hell—each suffering according to their original intentions and actions. Seeing this, I felt deeply. In this world, no one can escape the laws of karma and cause and effect. Beyond the Emperor and officials I knew, there are so many people in this world today who suffer retribution for the sake of power and profit. The hells are filled with famous people, officials, and those in high positions. They were all blinded by immediate gain, choosing to fight and possess, only to regret it when the retribution arrived. Some are still suffering from the moment of their death, while others still possess a human body but are interrogated every night, continuing to create karma during the day until their lifespan ends and they formally enter hell. I ask the people of the world: is a moment of competitiveness and greed, followed by fifty or sixty years of enjoyment, worth decades or centuries of hellish retribution? Or perhaps being reborn as various animals? Is this what everyone wants? I hope this serves as a warning to all.

I am grateful to Practitioner Su for leading us sixty jailers to the West. There are still countless jailers in line, waiting for the opportunity to go to the Western Pure Land of Ultimate Bliss. Furthermore, I am grateful that Practitioner Su comes to the hells every day to perform Chao Du, bringing the opportunity for rebirth in the Western Pure Land to those hell-beings who are willing to change. I am grateful for everything."

Recorded by the Buddha-disciple Shi Faxin.