This is a record of an interview with Peter Meagher, a victim of the Bondi Beach shooting who sought deliverance at the Hsiang Kuang Buddhist Centre in Australia. He now resides in the . This account reflects upon his life and his transition following the tragic event. Recorded by the chief writer, Shi Fa, on December 22, 2025.
Peter Meagher speaks:
". I am Peter Meagher. The sunlight was dancing across the surface of the ocean at the beach that day; it was so bright that you could hardly distinguish the shimmering water from the sweat and life-force of the people around us. It was a holiday, and I had come to Bondi Beach with my partner. We were staying at a hotel we had booked well in advance, enjoying a short getaway. We were inseparable, experiencing each other's lives in the most intimate and direct way possible.
A Longing for Unconditional Love
I lost both my parents at a young age. My father died in a workplace accident when I was seven, and my mother left me shortly after I was born. Because of this, I always craved a mother figure in my life—someone who would love and accept me unconditionally. Although I never had the experience of being raised by a mother, I believed that a mother’s love was like the earth itself, vast and capable of supporting everything her children carry. It is such a magnificent role. My partner and I had been together for three years, and I was certain she was the one I wanted to marry. I had even prepared an engagement ring to propose to her at the end of this holiday. I never imagined that this beach would become the final destination for both of our lives.
Three bullets ended the life of Peter Meagher. In those final moments, I did not feel regret for the loss of my own life or my partner's; instead, I felt a profound sense of repentance toward the Almighty Lord Jesus. In the Christian faith, both men and women are encouraged to remain pure before marriage, but as a Christian, I had not upheld this. The pain of losing my parents was something I had overcome through the Gospel of Jesus Christ. I had sworn at my baptism to live according to the Lord's teachings, but I had failed to truly do so, falling into the trap of carnal desire. As I died, I repented deeply for everything I had done in this life, and I passed away with the word 'Amen' in my heart.
The Suddenness of Death
On that day at the beach, my partner and I were lost in a kiss, holding each other tightly. The event happened so suddenly that I have no clear memory of the process of dying. I only remember us kissing, and then, a gunshot followed by the screams of the crowd. Before I could even react, I was struck by bullets while still in her arms. I was facing away from the shooter, and I felt a surge of intense pain as I was hit multiple times. As I died, I looked into the terrified eyes of my partner and thought, 'Could this be the for violating God's ?' Because I am gay—a subject of great controversy within Christian doctrine—I had habitually avoided talking about it. But now, to help others, I must speak the truth. After death, I was filled with regret, and with that heavy heart, I became a spirit without a body—what Westerners call a ghost or a phantom.
I stood there watching my own corpse, circling it again and again. I watched the people on the beach screaming and fleeing, and I watched the shooter heartlessly harvesting lives. I was completely helpless. I could only keep chanting, 'Lord, please forgive my sins!' I do not know how much time passed, but suddenly, a golden light seemed to descend from the entire sky, covering everything and transporting me to the Western -Nature Land of the Hsiang Kuang Pure Land Buddhist Centre in Toowoomba, Queensland, Australia.
From Hell to Heaven
It was a miraculous experience. In an instant, I arrived in a place with an entirely different energy field. Peter Meagher, who had been in a state of chaos and turmoil, suddenly became calm. It was as if I had been transported from hell to heaven in a heartbeat. My entire being relaxed. My tense and anxious soul, now in this Pure Land filled with the fragrance of lotus flowers, naturally understood: 'It is alright now. There is no need to be tense, no need to worry.' At that moment, I truly believed this was heaven, and that the Lord had heard my repentance. The only thing that felt unique was that I could hear the sound of 'Namo Amituofo' at every moment. I knelt on a lotus seat and repented to Lord Jesus, thanking Him for guiding a sinner like me to heaven. Later, I slowly learned that this place is far better than heaven. It is called the Western Dharma-Nature Land, established by a human being named Practitioner Su. I suspect he might be like the ancient Holy Spirit spoken of in Christianity.
I know now that the great Namo Amituofo shone His light upon Bondi Beach to save us, the victims of that shooting, which is why I am able to exist in this bright and beautiful world today. Here, I can listen to the teachings of Namo Amituofo, delivered by an awakened being named Practitioner Su. Miraculously, the more I listen, the happier I become. I have learned that Namo Amituofo created the Western Pure Land of Ultimate Bliss, which is far more beautiful than heaven. One should make a vow to be reborn in the Western Pure Land of Ultimate Bliss, where there is no suffering, only , and life is infinitely long.
The True Meaning of Repentance
I now understand that when I was dying and kept saying to Lord Jesus, 'Lord, please forgive my sins!', it was not truly sincere. My heart at that time was filled with tension and anxiety; I was more concerned with myself. I now understand that true repentance is not for oneself, but for others and for all beings. Constantly kneeling before the Lord and saying, 'Lord, I am sorry, I was wrong,' is all garbage; it is useless and can even have the opposite effect. True repentance is simply chanting 'Namo Amituofo' to the end. I learned this from watching videos of Practitioner Su giving Dharma talks at the Hsiang Kuang Pure Land Buddhist Centre.
There are other Australians in the Western Dharma-Nature Land. They told me they arrived here long before I did. They told me that Practitioner Su saved them—the lonely wandering spirits near the Bondi area. They had been living in cemeteries, leading dim lives lacking energy. After being brought here by Practitioner Su, they are radiant every day, and the Buddha-light provides them with abundant energy. They told me that Lord Jesus had actually visited the Western Dharma-Nature Land before; it was Practitioner Su who led Him from heaven to this place, and now Lord Jesus has been sent by Practitioner Su to the Western Pure Land of Ultimate Bliss. I was astonished to hear this. If even Lord Jesus is going to the Western Pure Land of Ultimate Bliss, then Peter Meagher certainly must go there as well.
A Life Beyond Vacation
I am doing very well now. This world of light is vast. Peter Meagher sits on a lotus seat, and I have never felt so happy. Golden light is scattered across countless lotus seats, and I chant the Buddha's name along with the sound of 'Namo Amituofo' echoing in the air. When I was a human, I always loved vacations, where I could put down the various afflictions and burdens of life and work. But vacations always come to an end. Here in the Dharma-Nature Land, every day is better than a vacation. It is so relaxing. It turns out that having nothing to do and nothing to worry about is such a blissful state. There is no need to be tense, no need to expend any effort. The only thing to do is to make a vow to be reborn in the Western Pure Land of Ultimate Bliss and to chant this 'Namo Amituofo' well every day.
I want to tell everyone: Namo Amituofo saved Peter Meagher, and I have never felt better! I have now joined the salvation team of Namo Amituofo, and we are all helping people. I hope my friends can come to the Hsiang Kuang Pure Land Buddhist Centre to find me. I want to tell my partner, Griffin, that our relationship did not have a happy ending. I believe this was unexpected for both of us. Life is full of accidents, but this accident led me to Namo Amituofo, which is a wonderful thing. More people should know about this. I hope you can help me let more people know about the true Pure Land in the human world. And to my friends from the guitar club, we spent many wonderful times together; I hope you can come to the Hsiang Kuang Pure Land Buddhist Centre to see me. To everyone who knew Peter Meagher, I have been reborn here, waiting for every friend to come and speak with me.
A Past Revealed
To help more people, I have decided to share a part of my past that I previously preferred to keep hidden. I was once a police officer. After transitioning to become an online writer, I did not want people to know, because when I was a police officer, I accidentally killed someone due to excessive force. It caused a huge scandal at the time, but the police chief had a connection to me and helped suppress the matter. I must emphasize that everything was technically legal, but as a police officer, one must write reports for any injury or death, and cases involving human life are always scrutinized under strict standards. In any case, the chief helped me a lot, and I am very grateful to him; he was a fair and good officer and leader. However, because I could not get past it in my heart and did not want to cause him any more trouble, I decided to resign. I felt that a police officer who cannot control the gun in his hand is not qualified to be a police officer, and if a police officer is not a good one, he has no reason to exist. Police are entrusted by the government with legal weapons not to harm the public, but to make them feel more secure. Regardless of the reasons, I could not forgive my own negligence.
After I stopped being a police officer, I did not know what to do, as my previous work was not office-based but field-based. Later, I decided to become an online writer, as I felt it was a profession where I could utilize my skills. I would submit professional content or reviews for articles related to my expertise, including product evaluations. However, I had one rule: I would never show my face. Any project that required my photo or appearance in a video was rejected, because I could use a pen name online, but if my face were recognized, it would not be a pleasant experience for me. My past record is a stain on my life. After that error and my subsequent career change, I underwent a great transformation. Not only did I go from being heterosexual to gay, but I also became a Christian. Perhaps in the traditional sense, I am not a standard Christian, but I still believe that Lord Jesus will accept me despite all my sins. I have made Jesus Christ my lifelong faith, which is why, even as a gay man, I still believe in Him.
The Truth of My Transformation
My change in sexual orientation had a reason. The poor person I accidentally killed was a young, beautiful woman. I could not forget her face. Whenever I saw a woman who moved me, I would think of her dying under my gun. Eventually, I lost interest in women and became gay. I know this is hard to believe, but it is the truth. Although I played the role of the 'man' in my gay relationship, it still shocked those around me. Even my friends found it hard to accept, thinking I was joking, until they finally asked me and received the answer that it was indeed true.
When I was shot, the professional instincts of Peter Meagher had already kicked in, but I knew that if I moved, Griffin would likely be killed. So I remained still and continued to hold Griffin tightly because I loved him. Whether viewed from the perspective of the woman I accidentally killed or from the fact that I violated God's precepts, Peter Meagher was a sinner. Since that was the case, I decided to use my life to atone for my sins and exchange it for Griffin's survival. That was my thought at the time. I used my professional training to skillfully press Griffin beneath me as I fell, increasing his chances of survival.
I am grateful to have come to the Western Dharma-Nature Land of the Hsiang Kuang Pure Land Buddhist Centre in Australia, which allowed me to hear the teachings of Namo Amituofo. I now understand the true meaning of repentance. The expression through words and language is merely a skillful means; perhaps only those who have truly walked this path can understand. I am so grateful to Practitioner Su for teaching me this principle: 'Chanting one Buddha's name to the end is true repentance.' These are such compassionate and wise words. If not for this, I do not think I could have ever let go of those painful memories and become the Peter Meagher who is now full of smiles and Dharma joy.
Such a Pure Land—the Hsiang Kuang Pure Land Buddhist Centre in Toowoomba, Queensland, Australia—must be known by more people. I believe there are too many people in the world trapped in suffering who do not know how to get out, just as I once was. I appeal to my former police colleagues, and to everyone else in the world: I am here at the Hsiang Kuang Pure Land Buddhist Centre. If you are someone who knows suffering, please come to see me and talk to me. If you are someone who thinks life is beautiful, please also come to see me, because here I have found a destination far more beautiful than anything in the human world—the Western Dharma-Nature Land, and the Western Pure Land of Ultimate Bliss.
Thank you, Namo Amituofo. Thank you, Practitioner Su. And thank you to everyone at the Hsiang Kuang Pure Land Buddhist Centre.
