The Burden of a False Reputation

This interview was recorded on July 20, 2025, by the chief writer, Shi Faxi. Lin Qitian, a spirit who served as a prison guard in the spiritual realms, sought deliverance through the Hsiang Kuang Pure Land Buddhist Centre. Having realised the vanity of his past life and the heavy burden of his false reputation, he now resides in the Western Pure Land of Ultimate Bliss.

Lin Qitian speaks:

"We all know that we need to change, but often, people do not even realise what it is within themselves that needs changing.

I am filled with endless gratitude that I can be reborn in the Western Pure Land of Ultimate Bliss today. I offer my deepest thanks to Namo Amituofo and to Practitioner Su. On behalf of all the prison guards in the spiritual realms, I kowtow to express my gratitude for the Buddha's grace and the kindness of Practitioner Su. Namo Amituofo."

The Mask of a Virtuous Man

"In my past life, I was a man who performed many good deeds. I was born into a scholarly family, and from a young age, I was intelligent, well-mannered, and articulate. I handled everything with such order and grace that I earned the respect of everyone around me. In my youth, I began to engage in charitable works—relieving the poor, donating to support education, and sponsoring the construction of temples. My reputation spread far and wide.

People called me a sage, a model of moral foundations. Whenever someone thanked me, I would always smile and say, 'This is simply what I ought to do.'

But no one knew that deep within my heart, there was a corner I kept hidden and silent. I cared deeply about how others perceived me. I loved being praised as 'noble,' 'selfless,' and a 'role model.'"

The Hidden Chains of Control

"In everything I did, there was always a pair of eyes watching: Did that person remember to be grateful? Did they obediently follow my instructions? Did they show me the proper respect in front of others?

I helped others, yet I could not tolerate them living their lives differently. I gave to sentient beings, yet I wanted them to grow exactly according to my methods. I used the tone of 'I am doing this for your own good' to suppress the choices of others, wrapping my desire for control in the packaging of 'good intentions.'

I performed countless good deeds throughout my life. When I passed away, thousands of people came to see me off. My disciples erected a stone monument, with the words carved in gold: 'The virtuous man Lin Qitian, joyful in giving, deep in blessings, his merits shall not be in vain.'

The human world sang praises of my compassion. The monastics recited the Sutras to assist me, and countless believers hailed me as the person with the greatest merit of our time."

The Judgment of the Soul

"However, in the Hall of King Yama, the King did not sing my praises. He simply asked me one question: 'Did you do all of this for the sake of sentient beings, or for yourself?'

I was instantly struck dumb. At that moment, I realised with a jolt that the deepest darkness of my life was hidden behind my most luminous words and deeds.

When I 'awoke' again, I found that I could not move, could not speak, and could not close my eyes. I had become a wooden plaque, hung high inside a bustling, incense-filled temple. On that plaque were written the words: 'The virtuous man Lin Qitian, joyful in giving, boundless blessings.'

The wood was heavy, with a red background and gold edges, carved with exquisite detail. It hung inside the mountain gate, where every pilgrim who entered would see it the moment they looked up."

A Prisoner of Praise

"Devotees would kneel, burn incense, and pay their respects, constantly gazing up at those four characters, whispering, 'May I be like Lay Practitioner Qitian, performing good deeds and accumulating blessings.' Parents would point at the plaque and tell their children, 'This is the best role model.' The elders would say, 'A person like this must have ascended to heaven after death.'

But no one knew that inside that plaque, there was a conscious spirit, painfully imprisoned. Every day, as I watched these scenes, my heart burned like fire. I wanted to scream, 'I am not a virtuous man!' I wanted to cry, 'What you see is not me; it is my disguise!'

I wanted to bow my head in repentance, but I was nailed to the wall. People looked up, praised, and made offerings, all directed at that false image from the past. Even more cruel was seeing how many people used my name to scold others: 'Why can't you be as selfless as Lin Qitian?' 'Look at him, decades of service without ever asking for anything in return!'

I was in agony. I knew these were not praises; they were like thorns, piercing my deepest heart, making me afraid to lift my head, filled with shame."

The Crack in the Facade

"Until one day, a young monk passed by. Looking at the peeling paint on the characters, he sighed softly, 'Is there anyone in this world who is truly great? To be without a self-conscious mind—only that is true Goodness.'

At that moment, a fine crack appeared deep within the plaque. My spirit trembled, and tears flowed like a spring. I whispered silently, 'I have never truly performed good deeds; I only... wanted to be seen as a good person.'

This single thought of truth instantly dissolved decades of karma. That night, the plaque quietly fell, and no one knew. My spirit was taken back into the underworld to await a new rebirth.

In this lifetime, I was born into a poor family, physically weak and prone to illness. From childhood, I suffered from asthma and was frequently sent to the hospital. I did not know why I felt so miserable; I only felt a blockage in my chest that would never dissipate.

I wanted to do good things, but I often failed. I wanted to help people, but I was always misunderstood. The more I tried to become a 'good person,' the more difficult it felt. Until one day, I became a humble caregiver in a hospice ward.

No one remembered my name, and no one praised my good deeds. But I cared for every elderly person nearing the end of their life, listening to their regrets and accompanying them until their very last breath.

One elderly lady held my hand and said, 'You are not like those people who speak so nicely on the surface. You are truly... accompanying me through this final journey.' That night, as I walked out of the ward and looked up at the night sky, I suddenly felt that I had never been so quiet, so clear-headed.

I no longer craved praise; I no longer wanted to be a role model. I simply wanted to help others—purely, sincerely, and without seeking anything in return."

The Call of the Dharma

"After my life ended, I returned to the Hall of King Yama. This time, the King nodded slightly: 'You have finally understood what it means to truly perform good deeds. Are you willing to go to the spiritual realms and guide those souls who are trapped in images and attachments?' I nodded gently and bowed my head.

I became a guide in the spiritual realms, walking through the dark places, accompanying countless souls trapped by 'hypocrisy,' 'self-reproach,' and 'saving face,' helping them see their own attachments step by step, and encouraging them to speak the truth and walk out of their illusions.

One day, while I was guiding a soul deeply mired in self-reproach, the voice of a teacher suddenly came from afar. It was the voice of Practitioner Su—so resonant, it deeply moved my heart. I finally achieved Awakening.

'A vow is not a vow to become someone; a vow is the heart that awakens from the illusion. If one performs good deeds while seeking an image, it is karma; a vow without a name—only that is the Way.'

I knelt on both knees, my face streaming with tears. 'This disciple makes a vow: I will no longer do good deeds just to look good. I will no longer put on a facade to avoid ugliness. I will no longer create Buddha statues just for the sake of a halo.'

'I vow to practise the true path, to walk the path of reality. I will no longer be someone for people to look up to, but rather, I will become a practitioner who is truly willing to bow down, to be honest, to repent, and to practise.'"

A Humble Practitioner

"From that day on, Lin Qitian was no longer anyone's role model, no longer a name for anyone to admire. I was simply a practitioner, guided by the power of my vow, walking steadily forward.

Vows arise from the true heart; the Way reveals itself through humility. The Buddha is not above an image; the Buddha is within the heart of the vow.

I am filled with gratitude that I can be reborn in the Western Pure Land of Ultimate Bliss today. On behalf of all the prison guards and all sentient beings with karmic affinity, I kowtow to express my gratitude for the Buddha's grace and the kindness of Practitioner Su. Namo Amituofo.

Lin Qitian, with palms joined."