The Burden of Unspoken Words

Chen Wenxi, a man who spent his life suppressing his emotions, sought deliverance through the compassionate guidance of Practitioner Su. After serving as a prison guard in the underworld, he was eventually led to the Western Pure Land of Ultimate Bliss. This interview was recorded by Chief Writer Shi Faxin on March 22, 2024.

Chen Wenxi speaks:

"The golden light before my eyes and the magnificence of the Western Pure Land of Ultimate Bliss made my entire body tremble. I saw the Buddha, so immense and majestic, right before me. I stammered as I chanted the Namo Amituofo, and before long, Practitioner Su took my hand, and I arrived in the Western Pure Land of Ultimate Bliss. I have my own lotus flower here, and I am filled with gratitude for this Causal Condition. I am grateful to all the Buddha or Bodhisattva who gathered to lead the boundless sentient beings, along with us sixty prison guards. I am deeply grateful to Practitioner Su.

I am Chen Wenxi. I understand the task given to me by King Yama: to act as a representative and write down my true self, providing a reference for everyone. I am very happy to do this now; it is, after all, a way of doing something good."

A Childhood of Gentle Discipline

"However, the person I was in the past would never have thought this way. My personality was very shy and introverted, and I grew up in a household that followed the rules strictly. My mother was a traditional woman who taught us children never to get into conflicts with others and to always yield if something happened. Because of this, the five of us siblings rarely argued. Whenever a dispute arose, all five of us had to listen to Mother’s counseling. When Mother began to counsel us, it would last for half a day. She was very gentle, using only soft persuasion. She would repeat the same principles many times, ensuring that every child confirmed they understood, and that we all knew how to react when similar situations occurred in the future. Only after we had practised it repeatedly would she let us go.

For us, every one of these educational sessions was deeply carved into our minds. Yet, because these sessions lasted so long, there were many times when we could not suppress our impatience. Still, we had to respect Mother; we could only leave when she said we could. Mother’s method of education was very different from other families."

The Weight of Unresolved Points

"Once, my younger brother and younger sister almost started a fight over a piece of candy. Everyone came out to mediate, and we went through a long lecture on the virtues of brotherly love and filial piety. Often, we felt that our eldest sister was just like Mother, and we were terrified that she would become exactly like her, lecturing us for a long time every single time. When our eldest sister began to lecture, everyone had to listen. Even if we were not at the scene of the incident, we would be called over to listen.

During one of those lectures, my second brother immediately interrupted: 'I was in the middle of playing with A-Xiong and was called back. Has everyone understood yet? If you understand, just shake hands and make up so we can all go back to doing our own things.' Hearing my second brother say that, I felt it made a lot of sense. After that, we developed a tacit understanding; we knew we had to speed up our comprehension of the lessons, put away our emotions, and not waste each other's time. Through this practice, we could all calm our emotions quite quickly."

The Silent Worker

"On the street, our uncles, aunts, and neighbors all praised us, saying we were very polite and that Mother had raised us well. Our family relied on Father’s income alone. When we children were sensible, Father’s hard work felt comforted, and he felt that everything was worth it. That was the background in which I grew up.

I was not a child who excelled at school, so at sixteen, through Father’s introduction, I went to work in a bicycle factory. I started as a bottom-level employee, learning about various bicycle parts and assembly techniques. Before I started, Father told me that no matter what kind of work I did, I must be diligent. Mother also instructed me that while doing my own work, I should help others if they were in need, and I must not be someone who only looks out for himself. Mother often made snacks for me to bring and share with everyone."

A Life of Stored Emotions

"The employees at the bicycle factory all knew that my mother was a person with great skills, and they all envied me for having such a wonderful mother. Even when everyone liked me, there were still those who looked at me with cold eyes. Several times, people spoke ill of me behind my back or tried to frame me. In such situations, I tried hard to remember what Mother taught me and endured everything.

I did not expect the other party to violate me time and time again, making it almost unbearable for me several times. I knew that each time, I would have intense fluctuations swaying in my heart. I complained to my eldest sister, and everyone told me to just endure it. So, many words were actually kept grumbling in my heart, never spoken out loud. As time passed, the things that had happened seemed to be forgotten, but they became one unresolved point after another in my heart.

It was not just at work; even after I married and started a family, my wife managed everything in the house. All family expenses, including how much money my wife would give me to use each month from the money I earned, were decided by her. Once, I saw that my younger brother was having difficulties at home and wanted to give him some money to help, but I was scolded by my wife. My wife, that miser, refused to take any money out. At that time, I was really angry in my heart, but for the sake of family harmony, I chose not to say anything."

The Cycle of Cause and Effect

"Throughout this life, I stored all the big and small voices in my heart. After storing them for so long, I didn't even know what was in there anymore; anyway, I just lived my life honestly every day. Besides managing the money, my wife didn't care where I went or what I was doing every day, so I used my spare time to serve the community. In the process of serving, I didn't talk much; I just did things silently. Only when I was doing these things did I feel that I truly existed.

When doing this, I didn't ask for any reward. Seeing many people’s living environments improve or even becoming more cheerful because of my help, I felt that our community volunteer group was very meaningful. I persisted like this, volunteering for over twenty years, and I donated every red envelope my children gave me during the Chinese New Year.

My wife was different from me; she always stayed at home to look after the children and grandchildren. To let the children eat better, she killed many geese. Before my wife passed away, her neck was stretched out long, and she couldn't move at all. When I was young, Mother taught us that every action has a cause and a fruit, and I told my wife the same, but unfortunately, she was unwilling to listen to me. After my wife passed away, I found a temple to perform Chao Du for her, hoping to help her eliminate some of her spiritual obstacles."

From Parrot to Prison Guard

"Since my wife passed away, I became economically independent and started to give money away in Generosity. Many people who knew me said I was a good person who did good deeds silently. At the end of my life, I contracted an acute cold. After severe coughing and even coughing up blood, I left this world.

When my spirit left my body, I heard many voices. These voices were all my own. I tried to listen carefully, but there were too many different voices overlapping. In the midst of the chaos, my spirit entered the body of a parrot, becoming a parrot. After becoming a parrot, I often opened my mouth to call out; in fact, I was speaking. The words I spoke were all the things I hadn't said in my heart before. Now I kept talking and talking, just hoping that these words would no longer accumulate in my heart.

The person who adopted me was someone I had helped before. In the past, I took care of him; now, it was his turn to take care of me. After being a parrot for two lifetimes, I finally emptied my heart. After the Causal Conditions that bound me to the world ended, my spirit was brought before the Hall of King Yama. In the Hall of King Yama, King Yama saw my Causal Conditions throughout my many lives and knew that when I was a human, I was a kind-hearted person who had accumulated many merits and virtues. Thus, he gave me the opportunity to serve sentient beings as a prison guard.

Having received this opportunity, I was deeply grateful in my heart. I have served in several hells and seen that some people truly committed the acts of killing, stealing, sexual misconduct, and lying, while others created karma due to their desires and fell into hell. All of these served as a great warning to me. Seeing so many scenes, I remembered that the words I had accumulated in my heart also turned me into a parrot. One must not ignore one's thoughts; I experienced this personally to understand this truth.

Later, while in hell, I heard Practitioner Su giving Dharma talks. The Dharma talks explained the laws of karma and cause and effect, as well as reincarnation, and further introduced me to the Buddha. I felt the Buddha’s compassion and hoped that one day I, too, could follow the Buddha and escape the cycle of rebirth. I hoped and prayed in my heart, and to my surprise, I really obtained it—the opportunity to be reborn in the Western Pure Land of Ultimate Bliss. This was an opportunity I had never even imagined. I am grateful to have seen the Buddha today.

Chen Wenxi bows in reverence."