The Darkness Within and the Path to Light

This is a record of an interview with Liu Tianhe, who sought Chao Du at the Hsiang Kuang Pure Land Buddhist Centre in Australia. He now resides in the Western Land of Ultimate Bliss. This account reflects upon his life and his subsequent experiences in the realms of suffering. Recorded by the chief writer, Shi Fa, on December 27, 2024.

Liu Tianhe speaks:

"Namo Amituofo. Today, during the Dharma assembly, a golden light suddenly appeared—a truly magnificent and solemn sight before my eyes. The Buddha-name resonated through the heavens, and countless sentient beings surged toward the light. I saw that everyone was deeply moved. Under the guidance of Practitioner Su, I, along with fifty-nine other prison guards, have been led to rebirth in the Western Land of Ultimate Bliss. Everything, every single thing, can only be described with gratitude—gratitude to the Buddha, and gratitude to Practitioner Su, for allowing my wandering spirit to be reborn once again.

A Legacy of Killing

I am Liu Tianhe. I grew up in a very simple, small town. My grandfather was a kind and honest man, but in our town, eating and selling dog meat was a common practice. My grandfather followed this trend. After he married and had three children, he made his living entirely by selling dog meat. Most days, he would go to a place where dogs were raised, select a few, and have them processed for his stall. That was his source of income for the day.

In our town, eating dog meat was as common as eating pork or chicken. His business was usually very good; often, by noon, he had already sold his entire stock. However, when my grandfather was thirty-seven years old, as he was preparing to close his stall, he suddenly slipped and fell hard onto the ground. He was in immense pain. That fall injured his sciatic nerve, and from that moment on, his lower body was paralysed.

The Haunting of the Soul

My grandfather saw, in his own vision as he fell, a great number of dogs rushing toward him, biting him. He was terrified, but no matter how hard he tried, he could not crawl away. After the fall, while resting in bed, he continued to see many dogs surrounding him in his dreams. It was then that he realised that the dog meat he had been selling was the result of harming lives. He thought about how he had personally selected those dogs, and how they were slaughtered right before his eyes. He asked himself, 'How could I have been so cruel?' He had never once thought that what he was doing was wrong.

But now, unable to walk, he knew this was a debt he had to repay. The lives of those dogs—he owed too much. For many nights, he suffered through nightmares, his vision filled with bloody, unbearable scenes. My grandfather began to repent incessantly in his heart. He told my grandmother everything, and she, too, felt deep remorse for those dogs.

Sculpting Repentance

My grandmother took my grandfather to the nearest local Earth God temple to pray, repent, and make offerings to the spirits of the dogs that had been slaughtered because of him. In the days that followed, my grandmother took on the burden of supporting the family alone, working everywhere and washing clothes. After my grandfather lost the ability to walk, he learned to carve. He carved one gourd after another, each one filled with his deep repentance and blessings. He would leave these blessings at the Earth God temple for people to take.

When relatives and friends came to visit, my grandfather would tell them why he had become this way—that he had harmed too many lives. Many were shocked to hear him say this, but for them, giving up the habit of eating dog meat was difficult. My grandfather knew this, so he could only counsel them without forcing the issue. Even so, many in town continued to eat dog meat. When my grandfather looked into their eyes, he saw many becoming fierce, and some even began to take on the faces of dogs.

A Talent Born of Sorrow

Although our family's finances were poor because my grandfather could no longer work, my grandmother raised us children, and day by day, life remained relatively peaceful. Before my grandfather passed away, he instructed us children never to engage in the business of killing again. My father, having watched my grandfather carve gourds since he was a child, developed a great interest in handicrafts. It was as if he only needed to look at something to know how to carve it, creating lifelike figures with ease.

Because my father's carvings were so unique, many people loved them, and his reputation gradually spread. Many called him a 'genius sculptor.' I was proud of my father for earning that title. His work brought us a better life, but for my father, his success was built on hardship, blood, and tears. Perhaps influenced by my grandfather's inability to walk in his later years, my father was very pessimistic about life. He always felt that impermanence and illness could arrive at any moment, and once they did, he hoped he could leave quickly. He often spoke of death, which made my mother, my siblings, and me feel very uneasy.

Seeking the Truth

It was only when I was older that I could understand my father's feelings, but that sense of deep-seated anxiety had already been buried in my heart. To find peace, I visited many places and explored various spiritual groups and religions. Finally, I found the Buddha’s teachings. The Buddha’s teachings told me that life could transcend birth and death. Death is not the true end; it is a transformation of the soul. Understanding this, I was no longer so afraid of death, and I knew that before dying, one could rely on one's own efforts to resolve conflicts with karmic creditors.

I inherited my father's carving skills and began to carve Buddha statues. In the process of carving these statues, my heart felt very peaceful and calm. I knew this must be the blessing of the Buddhas and Bodhisattvas. Through the process of carving one statue after another, I was purified, and my heart was released. Several times while carving, I saw light, which made me believe in the Buddha even more, and I began to experience the Buddha's compassion for all beings.

The Darkness and the Choice

In the past, my heart always felt a deep suffering, a pain I could not describe. I did not understand why I was so miserable. I asked myself, but I could never find the answer. It was not until I was carving a statue of Ksitigarbha Bodhisattva that I saw the scene of the endless sea of suffering of sentient beings. That scene was profound. I felt that the hearts of these suffering beings were extremely restless. They were bobbing and sinking in their suffering, and the light of the Buddhas and Bodhisattvas shone down, leading those who were willing to let go of their suffering.

Only then did I realise that the painful feeling I could not escape was actually me holding onto myself tightly. It was this tight grip that kept me in constant suffering. Only by being willing to let go and relax could I truly walk out of the pain. When I saw these scenes and realised this, I knew that I was the only one who could truly help myself. I am very grateful to the Buddhas and Bodhisattvas; I know this was their guidance. From that day on, I made a vow to follow the Buddha, and I surrendered myself to Him.

The Descent and the Deliverance

After making this vow, I found that my state of mind during the carving process was completely different—although there was still darkness in my life, there was much more light. I vowed to be reborn in the Western Land of Ultimate Bliss. I worked hard to calm my heart, hoping to be in sync with the Buddha's magnetic field. However, the demons in my heart were still pulling at me, often leaving me with a sense of emptiness. My heart fluctuated, and I was often filled with worry and fear. I wanted to know where these feelings came from, but I could not find the source. Eventually, I locked myself in a dark corner of my heart and forgot the Buddha’s teachings.

In the end, I chose a very violent way to end my life to solve the things I could not face. After death, I remained in the space of my own suicide, trapped by suffering. My family held one Dharma assembly after another for me, and only then was I finally able to leave. My spirit arrived in the hells to face judgment. Suicide is a sin, but carving statues for the Buddha with sincerity is a merit. Between merit and sin, I had to suffer for my sins first before I could receive the merits. Therefore, after suffering and being punished in the hells, I received the merits and served as a prison guard.

A Final Gratitude

During my time as a prison guard, I truly saw the worst of human nature. These flaws exist in everyone; it is just that for those who manifest them more clearly, they create heavy karmic retribution. Many beings in the hells have no opportunity to wake up. I felt heartbroken watching them, and I silently made a vow that one day I would be able to help them. Unexpectedly, I had the opportunity to hear Practitioner Su giving Dharma talks. Practitioner Su allowed me to truly know Namo Amituofo and the Western Land of Ultimate Bliss. I am very grateful to him, and I hope that in the future, I will have the opportunity to go to the Western Land of Ultimate Bliss.

Waiting until today, I have truly waited for the Causal Conditions to ripen, and I am extremely grateful. Gratitude to the Buddha, gratitude to Practitioner Su. I am grateful for the opportunity to speak today. I hope more people will understand the laws of karma and cause and effect, and develop the heart to seek liberation. Once again, gratitude to the Buddha, gratitude to Practitioner Su."

Liu Tianhe, with palms joined.

※ The grandfather of prison guard Liu Tianhe, Liu Shenguo, was a small dog, and was led by Practitioner Su into the Western Land of Dharma Nature.