This is a record of an interview with Lin Xidan, who sought deliverance at the Hsiang Kuang Buddhist Centre in Australia. He now resides in the Western Pure Land of Ultimate Bliss. This account reflects upon his past life of failed practice and his subsequent service as a prison guard in the underworld. Recorded by the chief writer, Shi Fa, on November 12, 2023.
Lin Xidan speaks:
". I am Lin Xidan. In the past, I understood the benefits of practice, yet I could never truly realise my true nature or attain the fruit of the path. Today, I am profoundly grateful for the existence of such a true spiritual friend as Practitioner Su. It is only through his presence that I have been granted this precious opportunity for liberation. I wish to first represent all the prison guards and sentient beings with karmic affinity to express my deepest gratitude for the Buddha's grace and the grace of Practitioner Su. Namo Amituofo."
The Illusion of High Ideals
"I was once a disciple within the Buddha’s gate. I held lofty ideals, yearning to achieve success in my practice and walk the path of liberation. From the very moment I stepped into the temple, I made a firm vow to engage in diligent practice and attain Buddhahood as soon as possible. I was full of fire and determination.
However, I did not realise that when spiritual obstacles and deep-seated habits arose, I would be completely unable to defend myself. I became obstructed by my own ego. Eventually, I drifted far from my original intention, lost my way, and wasted every single day of my life in a state of spiritual stagnation. My practice became nothing more than a hollow shell."
The Trap of Ego-Attachment
"In the end, all my efforts were directed toward this false body. I could not break free from my attachment and cherishing of this physical form. I developed a massive problem with ego-attachment, yet I was completely unaware of it. My practice hit a wall, a massive, insurmountable difficulty, and ultimately, my practice failed.
Beyond losing myself, this body became a cage. I could no longer be the master of my own mind. I was no longer the person I once was. My mental notes were easily corrupted by negative thoughts; my moods fluctuated wildly. I became selfish, constantly fighting for my own interests and protecting my own ego. These things caused me to mutate, to become something truly terrifying. I was in such agony, yet I could not find a way out!"
The Price of Desire
"I paid a heavy price for this body! While still young, in my thirties, my body was no longer under my control. Because of the desires and greed of this physical form, I began to fall into states of , frequently slipping into other spaces. During my daily practice, I was often listless, lacking spirit, and completely unable to engage in diligent practice. My heart had no goal, no direction; my practice had lost all its momentum.
I began to feel uneasy, and the sense of emptiness within me intensified. The dark side of my heart continued to expand. Eventually, I fell into doubt. I stopped trusting others, and whenever I looked at a situation, I would immediately focus on the worst possible outcome. I could not change myself, and this situation only continued to deteriorate."
A Tragic End and the Cycle of Sleep
"Ultimately, before I reached the age of fifty, I lost my life in an accident. This accident was orchestrated by my . They first made me lose my focus, then led me into danger. I did not know how to dodge, and I lost my life on the spot. I had practised for a lifetime, but the result was not good because, during the process, I lacked the awareness to discover my own problems and obstacles. I remained attached to my own subjective views and was stubborn about this body.
After I died, I was first seized by other beings, and later I entered a different space. I wandered around the space surrounding the temple, eventually stopping on a large rock. This rock was under a large tree—the very place where I, in my past life, would often be lazy in my practice, sitting on that rock to rest and sleep. Now, I had developed a habit; even after leaving my body, my spirit would naturally return there to sleep, entering a space of deep, unconscious slumber.
I slept on that rock for hundreds of years, unable to wake up, until I heard the sound of the six-character name, Namo Amituofo. Only then did I wake up, but before I could attain liberation, my spirit would fall back into a deep sleep. This cycle repeated for centuries until I was finally saved."
A New Life and the Path of Service
"After emerging from that rock, I quickly entered the cycle of rebirth and was reborn into this world. In this lifetime, my name is Lin Xidan, and I was born into a family that believes in the Buddha. My parents deeply believed in the power of Goodness; they taught me to do good deeds and to be a kind person. From a young age, I was surrounded by the sound of temple bells and the scent of incense. My father was an elder in the village, and my mother was a compassionate woman who always told me stories about the Buddha. This gave me a deep interest in the Buddha’s teachings from childhood.
As the years passed, I grew up in the village and began to show some unique traits. My parents believed I was the good fruit of my past practice. One day, a monk from afar came to our village. He heard of my deeds and was very interested in me. To me, this monk seemed like a messenger of the Buddha; he led me onto a deeper path of practice. He taught me meditation and the recitation of sutras, allowing me to have a deeper realisation of the . Years later, my practice began to improve, though it was not always smooth sailing. I encountered various tests, and at times, I even doubted if I could persist."
The Wisdom of the Underworld
"During a meditation session, I dreamt of an ancient elder draped in golden light with a kind face. He told me he was my master from a past life and had descended in this life to lead me in my practice. From then on, my faith in practice became even firmer. I built a small temple in the village and became a spiritual guide for the people. People came to the temple seeking spiritual refuge and liberation. My parents were also happy for me, seeing that I not only helped the village materially but also provided spiritual support.
As I grew older, the Wisdom I gained in my practice grew deeper, and I became a respected elder. My life, like an ancient novel, experienced both hardship and hope, eventually reaching a state of inner peace. I am very grateful for all the connections I have met during these days of reincarnation. At the end of my life, I chose to stay behind to help more beings. I negotiated with the King of Hell, hoping to have more opportunities to serve sentient beings. The King of Hell agreed and arranged for me to provide guidance to beings in the Hall of the King of Hell.
I am so joyful that today I can hear Practitioner Su give Dharma talks. These Truths and the great Dharma can capture the hearts of people. I can understand that this is the Wisdom and the power of liberation that I have needed all along. Finally, today, I have obtained this opportunity for liberation. Lin Xidan represents all the prison guards and sentient beings with karmic affinity to express my deepest gratitude for the Buddha's grace and the grace of Practitioner Su. Namo Amituofo."
"Lin Xidan, with palms joined in respect. Namo Amituofo."
