The Redemption of Xu Ningzhu: From Prison Guard to Pure Land

This is a record of an interview with Xu Ningzhu, who sought Chao Du at the Hsiang Kuang Pure Land Buddhist Centre in Australia. He now resides in the Western Land of Ultimate Bliss. This account reflects upon his life and his subsequent journey through the realms of existence. Recorded by the chief writer, Shi Fajing, on March 16, 2024.

Xu Ningzhu speaks:

"Namo Amituofo. We waited quietly, participating in the Dharma assembly and chanting the Buddha's name. When the 'Great Praise to Namo Amituofo' was sung during the ceremony, that was the moment Practitioner Su guided us toward the Western Land of Ultimate Bliss. We were so excited, so filled with gratitude. Upon arriving in the West, my heart was moved beyond measure. This truly is the Western Land of Ultimate Bliss. The towering, majestic Namo Amituofo and the Western Trinity stood right before us. We knelt and kowtowed, offering thanks upon thanks. Gratitude to Namo Amituofo, and gratitude to Practitioner Su."

A Life Defined by Laughter

"Although my name contains the character for 'bamboo,' my physique was nothing like a bamboo stalk; instead, I was short, round, and stout. From a young age, I was the target of everyone's mockery. Many people could not help but laugh when they saw me—laughing at my weight, my height, and even my slight intellectual disability. Seeing how happy they were when they laughed, I felt happy too. When they saw me smiling back at them, they found it even funnier, calling me a complete fool.

In truth, it was not that I did not know they were laughing at me. I was genuinely happy because my existence served a great purpose: I could entertain everyone and bring them joy! Therefore, I never once thought about losing weight. There was no need; I was content to let everyone have their fun.

My parents, however, did not see it that way. They always wanted me to eat less, feeling that being mocked this way caused them to lose face. You see, my parents were both intellectuals—they were teachers at a school.

I originally thought I would attend the school where my parents taught, but that was not the case. They arranged for me to attend a different school, one quite a distance from our home. At first, I was confused. Why wouldn't they let me study at their school? Why take me so far away? Later, I realised it was because I made them feel ashamed, so they made that arrangement intentionally.

Regarding my parents' actions, I felt a bit sad in my heart. After all, they were my parents, yet they could not accept me as I was. How was I to think? How was I to view my parents? For a time, I truly could not find my way out of that darkness. During those days, the smile vanished from my face. Not wanting my parents to see me like that, I returned to the countryside to live with my grandparents."

The Wisdom of the Heart

"My grandparents loved me dearly, but their love was never about spoiling me. They knew how to teach me, guiding me to grow up with a more correct perspective. The reason I was not afraid of being mocked was because of my grandparents. They gave me the concept that I could become a 'source of joy' for everyone, and that this was a good thing, because so many people in this world live such unhappy lives.

Although I was labelled as a child with intellectual disabilities, I knew clearly within myself that sometimes, a 'ray of hope' would suddenly appear in my head, a feeling of instantaneous brightness. In those moments, my mind was incredibly clear; there was absolutely no issue with my intelligence. But that state of clarity would quickly vanish; it only appeared fleetingly.

I once seized the moment when that ray of hope appeared to quickly observe my home environment, as well as my father, mother, grandfather, and grandmother. In that instant, I felt that this home and my family were complete strangers. It was as if I did not know them at all, even though they were my family. After the light faded and things returned to normal, my head felt covered by thick, heavy layers once again. I would look at my home and my family, and the feeling would change—they were my family! There was nothing strange about it. Why had I felt they were strangers just moments before?

I was always puzzled by this, but no one could understand. They all thought I was muddled and talking nonsense. But in truth, I was not. I really had those feelings, and it happened not just once, but many times."

A Stranger's Guidance

"However, among all those people, there was one who was willing to believe me: my grandmother. One day, while I was walking home, a stranger approached me and said, 'Little one, if you do not want your head to be interfered with, I will teach you a good method. If you follow it, you will slowly get better.' I was so happy and immediately asked, 'What is this good method?' He replied, 'From now on, do good deeds every day. But do not do them for yourself; sincerely help others. Then, no matter what happens to you, think of the good, and see the good. Just follow this, and I guarantee you will see a great change.'

I truly followed the method that stranger taught me. Every day, I helped others. Whether it was a big task or a small one, as long as it was something I could do, I did it actively, and without seeking any reward. At first, I was still doing it for myself, wanting to reduce the interference in my head. But as I helped more people, I felt the joy of helping others more deeply. I grew to love this feeling, and I grew to love this version of myself. Furthermore, I listened to the stranger's words: I thought of the good, and I saw the good. When I did this, I was so happy—every day was filled with joy. It seemed as if nothing could make me sad or angry. Even when others intentionally humiliated me, I was able to think of the good in their actions.

After three years, I had made doing good a part of my life, as natural as eating. I also made 'seeing the good' and 'thinking of the good' part of my character. I did not need to force it; it happened naturally.

I successfully moulded myself into a different kind of person: optimistic, happy, and eager to help. Invisibly, my head began to change, which I could clearly feel. It was as if the defect of my intellectual disability had vanished; my intelligence had almost returned to normal. The thick, black layers that had covered my head seemed to peel away, layer by layer.

As these obstacles decreased, my head slowly began to see many scenes from the past. The first thing I saw was that I had once been a teacher, but for my own personal gain, I had misled many students, ruining their lives. These sins alone were enough to cause me to be born with low intelligence in this life."

The Burden of Karma and the Role of a Prison Guard

"I repented sincerely and became even more earnest in doing good and helping others. Later, I also began to see the past of others, knowing what karma they had created that led to the encounters they faced in this life. Thus, I prayed to the heavens, asking for the strength to have the Wisdom and ability to help others. My vow truly began to take effect. When people came before me, I could not only see their past, but I also began to have the Wisdom to know how to guide them to change—though I never directly told them who among their acquaintances was their enemy from the past.

Many people, under my guidance and help, received tremendous benefits and changed their lives. In this life, I devoted myself entirely to helping others, so I never married or had children. I just spent my time helping people. I thought I was doing well, but I did not expect that when I reached eighty-one and my life came to an end, my spirit would emerge from my body and enter the space of a pair of shoes. Those were the shoes I wore most often, the ones I wore while walking everywhere to help people. So, in the moment before I died, I wanted to walk to the door to put on those shoes, and my spirit immediately entered the space of the shoes.

However, I did not stay in those shoes for long. Because of the merit I had accumulated from helping others, I had the chance to be saved from the space of the shoes after only about ten years. I entered the last pair of shoes that had a karmic connection with me—shoes worn by a woman. That woman had also been helped by me; she remembered me and was very grateful because I had saved her life. After she learned Buddhism, she went everywhere to help me perform Chao Du. During a Dharma assembly, she wore those shoes, which meant I was also attending. In that assembly, my spirit unexpectedly left the shoes, and the officials sent from the hells immediately took me away.

I was brought before King Yama. At first, I thought I was going to be punished. To my surprise, King Yama did not want to punish me; instead, he praised my good deeds during my life, noting that I had truly helped many people change their destinies. But because I still had karma, and many personality traits, habits, and attachments that I had not changed, I was eventually captured.

King Yama gave me the position of a prison guard, allowing me to serve in the hells. I was very grateful and cherished this opportunity. However, in the process of serving, my heart was truly pained, especially when seeing the suffering of the criminals in hell. I could not bear it.

Fortunately, I later began to hear Practitioner Su giving Dharma talks. The first time I heard them, I burst into tears, for I had never had the chance to hear the Buddha's teachings during my life. Only then did I understand that the Buddha's teachings are about the laws of karma and cause and effect. At that moment, I truly understood that to attain liberation, one must chant 'Namo Amituofo' and seek rebirth in the Western Land of Ultimate Bliss.

Now, I connect my past good deeds with the insights I gained from listening to the Dharma. I realise that I was only missing this Buddha-name; that is why, even after helping so many, I still lost myself in the end.

I understand now—I finally understand. I must quickly introduce the Buddha's teachings to these beings in hell. I also hope to return to the human world to save people. However, even more fortunately, before I could receive a new human body, Practitioner Su saved me and brought me to the Western Land of Ultimate Bliss. I was placed on the list to be guided to the West, and at this very moment, I am already in the Western Land of Ultimate Bliss.

I will not stay here forever, but I will use this time to strengthen my abilities. Then, when the Causal Conditions are ripe, I will certainly return to the human world to continue saving people. I pray that the Buddha gives me the ability to have greater Wisdom and greater compassion to help all beings."

"Xu Ningzhu bows in reverence."

Namo Amituofo.