This is a record of an interview with the Venerable Xin Qiao, who lived approximately 1,300 years ago. He now resides in the of Ultimate Bliss. This account reflects upon his life and his journey toward liberation. Recorded by the chief writer, Shi Fajing, on August 15, 2018.
Venerable Xin Qiao speaks:
". I am Xin Qiao. Looking back across the vast expanse of time, I see the life I led in the human world not as a series of random events, but as a carefully woven tapestry of cause and effect, guided by the boundless love of my mother. My mother was always a woman of delicate health. She spent much of her time resting in bed, which made the prospect of conception seem nearly impossible. Yet, I was the only child she ever brought into this world, a gift born of her immense sacrifice.
A Mother's Sacrifice and a Divine Choice
My father often spoke of her with such reverence. She was a woman of profound , always ready to set aside her own needs to assist others. She never cared for vanity or worldly appearances; the clothes she wore were mended time and again, yet she never complained. She understood that life in this world is fleeting, and she was determined to cherish every moment by performing good deeds to benefit society. It was this inherent Goodness that drew my father to her, and their love was as deep as it was enduring.
For many years after their marriage, they remained childless. It was only after a miraculous dream that I came to be. In that dream, my mother saw a brilliant golden light, and nothing else. A gentle voice spoke to her, saying, 'The good deeds you have performed over these years have extended your lifespan. You now have the choice to bring a child into this world. However, if you choose to have this child, your own life will soon come to an end, and you will not be able to enjoy the warmth of a family life. But if this child can develop the vow to save sentient beings, he will surely achieve success.' My mother did not answer in the dream, but in her heart, the choice was already made.
The Final Ten Months
Not long after, the news of her pregnancy spread through our home. When my father heard the news, he was so overcome with that he lifted my mother up and spun her around three times. Seeing his happiness, my mother felt certain that her choice was the right one, even though she knew with absolute clarity that these would be the final ten months of her life.
During those ten months, she did not waste a single moment. She spent every day in the study, writing tirelessly. It was only when the time for my birth arrived that she finally set down her pen, handing a large stack of papers to my father. He was so preoccupied with the excitement of my impending arrival that he did not look at what she had written, simply placing the papers into a cabinet in the study.
As my father waited outside the room, the silence stretched on, and he heard no cry from a newborn. Panic began to set in. Suddenly, the midwife rushed out, crying, 'The lady is in difficult labour! It is a crisis!' My father was distraught, but the midwife delivered a heart-breaking ultimatum: 'We can only save one—the mother or the child.' My mother had already anticipated that my father would choose her, so she had instructed the midwife beforehand to tell him that, no matter what, he must save the child. My father rushed into the room, weeping as he held her hand. My mother looked at him with a gentle smile, and with her final ounce of strength, she brought me into this world.
The Legacy of the Written Word
My father held her as she breathed her last, a faint smile still lingering on her lips. She was so joyful to welcome me into this world, even at the cost of her own life. After laying her to rest on the hill behind our home, my father cared for me with the utmost devotion, yet he remained trapped in his grief, his thoughts constantly returning to her.
One day, he remembered the stack of papers she had given him before my birth. He rushed to the study and retrieved them from the cabinet. As he read through them, he realised they were letters written to him and to me. The first was for my father, and the rest were messages for me. In her letters, she urged my father to guide me with care, to help me become a person of kindness, and to teach me the value of sacrifice and service to others.
My father raised me with great care until I was fifteen. It was then that he met a woman with whom he found great companionship, and they began to fall in love. The promises he had once made to my mother, the depth of his longing for her—all of it seemed to fade with the passage of time. I began to see clearly the illusory nature of worldly love; even the most moving vows can change when the conditions of life shift.
Learning Compassion Through Adversity
I read the twenty letters my mother had written for me—one for each year of my growth—over and over again. They were my compass. When my father remarried, my stepmother did not like me. She sought every opportunity to drive me from the house, often resorting to physical abuse. I was left covered in scars, in such pain that I could barely rest. Yet, I felt no hatred toward her. One of the letters my mother wrote taught me about 'compassion'. It was not a passive compassion that allowed the abuse to continue, but an active understanding of the suffering within my stepmother's own heart. She lacked security and clung to my father, seeing my presence as a threat to the love she craved. When I viewed her through the lens of compassion, I could empathise with her, and the hatred simply dissolved.
When I walked through the streets and saw those who were hungry and begging, I remembered my mother's teachings on 'gratitude' and 'contentment'. I realised that because of the care provided by my father and stepmother, I was at least able to have warm meals. She also taught me about 'joyful giving'. Even without money, she told me that a smile, a kind word, or a friendly gesture was a form of giving. Thus, I was always able to bring a little joy and warmth to others.
There were times when my spirits hit rock bottom, and I would weep alone in my room. In those moments, I would recall her lessons on 'courage' and 'independence', reminding myself to stand tall as a man of integrity. Every day, I applied her teachings to my life, cultivating a good character and preparing myself to be a person who could help others, never straying from the path of kindness, compassion, and a broad mind.
The Path to
When I turned twenty, I opened the final letter, which was titled 'Learning the Buddha's Teachings'. I began to seek out opportunities to encounter the . As I came to understand the illusory nature of this world and the suffering of all beings, I finally understood why my mother had wanted me to learn the Buddha's teachings. She was not only saving me; she was preparing me to save others.
I gradually learned to see through the attachments of the world, and I made the firm decision to let go, to leave the home life, and to vow to save all sentient beings. When I arrived at the temple, the master saw my compassionate and dignified appearance, and upon learning of my character, he praised the upbringing my parents had provided.
I did not shave my head immediately; I first learned to serve within the temple. Every day before the lectures, I would ensure the lecture hall and the masters' desks were impeccably clean. I would change into clean robes and wait outside the door, only entering once everyone else was seated. Though I sat at the very back, I cherished every single lesson. I followed the master's instructions in every task, learning and growing with each new challenge.
At twenty-five, I was ordained as a Bhikshu. Before the Buddha, I made a great vow: to dedicate my body and mind to the service of the Dharma, to develop the Bodhi mind, and to help all beings find liberation from their suffering.
The Infinite Grace of Practitioner Su
Practitioner Su has always been someone I deeply revere. Many lifetimes ago, I had a brief encounter with him. At that time, Practitioner Su was an eminent monk, and I was merely a common man. As he travelled, teaching and saving beings according to their karmic affinity, I met him on the road. He taught me to chant Namo Amituofo, and later, I too became a monk. I am eternally grateful for his compassionate guidance.
The scope of Practitioner Su's deliverance is vast and boundless. He seizes every second, working tirelessly to save all beings in the universe, regardless of whether they have a karmic connection or not. His vow is immeasurably deep; he faces the task of saving the world without fear, always moving forward with unwavering right and firm conviction. Namo Amituofo."
