The Mother Who Became a Prosthetic Leg

This is a record of an interview with Hua Meijuan, who sought deliverance at the Hsiang Kuang Pure Land Buddhist Centre in Australia. She now resides in the Western Land of Ultimate Bliss. This account reflects upon her life and her subsequent journey through the realms of samsara. Recorded by the chief writer, Shi Fajing, on August 5, 2023.

Hua Meijuan speaks:

"I have finally arrived at the Western Land of Ultimate Bliss! The feeling of letting go of everything is so light, so free—this is what true liberation feels like. I never imagined such peace could exist.

We, the sixty prison guards, are kneeling here to express our deepest gratitude for the Buddha’s grace. We are so thankful to Namo Amituofo and to Practitioner Su for giving us the opportunity to leave the hells and come to the Western Pure Land. Although our role as prison guards in the hells was not a form of punishment for our own past deeds, our time there was limited. Once our service ended, we would have been forced back into the cycle of rebirth. Even if we had been reborn in the human world, we would have had no guarantee of what kind of family we would be born into. If we had been born into a family that did not practise the Dharma, we might never have had the Causal Conditions to chant the Buddha-name and find our way out of samsara. That is why we are so incredibly grateful for this opportunity to reach the Western Land of Ultimate Bliss and attain eternal liberation."

A Life of Delusion and Attachment

"I am Hua Meijuan. Looking back at my life in the human world, I realise now how truly deluded I was. But I see clearly that I was not alone; so many people in this world are just like I was. They are trapped in their own attachments, unable to find a way out, and thus unable to attain liberation.

I began listening to my grandmother chant the Buddha-name when I was only seventeen. She would often chant with such a radiant, glowing face that everyone praised her for her devotion. They would encourage me to follow her example. I tried, but I simply could not chant with the same sincerity and focus that she possessed.

When I was twenty-seven, I met the man who would become my husband. We shared a beautiful bond, and we were blessed with three sons. Our family of five was incredibly happy and sweet. Once I had a family of my own, my heart and mind were entirely consumed by them. I was so busy caring for my husband and my three growing boys that I completely forgot about chanting. Even when the thought crossed my mind, I would tell myself, 'There is plenty of time; I will rest for a while and chant later.' I always had an excuse to be lazy. I never achieved the single-minded focus of my grandmother, who could chant so deeply that she became indifferent to worldly affairs.

My grandmother was a woman of immense kindness. Wherever she went, she introduced people to the practice of chanting and performed good deeds to help others. When she reached the end of her life, she passed away while chanting, her face looking incredibly dignified and her limbs remaining soft and supple. My father said she must have gone to the Western Land of Ultimate Bliss. Now, looking at her from here, I can see that she truly did reach the Western Pure Land. Her appearance is so majestic and dignified—she no longer looks like the grandmother I once knew, but like a Bodhisattva of the Western Land, radiating infinite dignity."

The Mother's Vow and the Prosthetic Leg

"I learned the compassion of my grandmother, but I failed to learn her faith and steadfastness in the Buddha. The fundamental reason for this was that I loved my family too much. I loved my husband and my children with such intensity that my mind was completely filled with them. I was willing to sacrifice everything for their sake. I would wake up early every morning to prepare breakfast, and I would spend my nights washing their clothes by hand because I wanted to ensure they were perfectly clean and free of germs before putting them through the washing machine. It took so much time, but I was willing—I was completely devoted to it.

There are so many women in this world who are as deluded as I was—too many to count. That is why I say I was not the only one. So many people are blinded by the false emotions of this world. Even with a grandmother so close to me, who demonstrated the truth of rebirth in the Western Pure Land, I still chose worldly attachments and forgot to chant. In the end, it was I who fell back into the cycle of rebirth, while my grandmother truly went to the West.

People often say that children come to us either to repay a kindness or to settle a debt. My three sons were all very well-behaved, but it was my youngest son who caused me the most heartache, for he was born missing a leg. Many parents who have children with disabilities might think they are 'debt collectors' sent to cause them suffering. I never thought that way. I loved my child so much that, even with his physical disability, I was willing to care for him and help him for the rest of my life, until I had no strength left.

Many people called me a 'great mother,' and his school even gave me awards, but I always felt I hadn't done enough. I wanted to do more, so my son became very dependent on me, and I found comfort in that dependency. We spent a great deal of money to get him a prosthetic leg so he could walk. Although he didn't walk like a normal person, at least he could move on his own. Every time I saw him struggling to walk, my heart ached. Sometimes, I even blamed myself, thinking that I was the reason he was missing a leg. This self-reproach was buried deep in my heart, a shadow that never left me my entire life. I felt I had failed him.

Do you know how much that mental note affected me? It was immense—so great that it determined my destination after death. I passed away at the age of forty-five, suffering from illness. Before I took my last breath, I remembered the image of my son when he was born, and the image of him with his prosthetic leg. My heart felt a sharp, familiar pain—the same pain I felt whenever I couldn't bear to see him suffer. That final pang of pain at the moment of death sealed my fate in the cycle of rebirth. My spirit entered the prosthetic leg my son wore, and I became that very leg."

Awakening in the Midst of Suffering

"During my life, I had actually made a vow. I once told my husband that I wanted to be the leg my son was missing. He thought I was talking nonsense, but I never expected that after I died, I would truly become his prosthetic leg, helping him walk and accompanying him through the final stretch of his life. If it hadn't happened to me, I would never have believed such a thing was possible.

After I finished being my son's prosthetic leg, I served as a prosthetic leg for three other people. In total, I spent about thirty years in that state. Every time I served as a prosthetic leg, I hoped to help those who, like my son, were missing a leg, so they could walk properly and not have to live such a difficult life. I still possessed the kind heart of my grandmother, so I did my absolute best to help those with disabilities.

Perhaps it was because of this intention that, during my final time as a prosthetic leg, I happened to be attached to a person who practised the Dharma. Every day, I could hear him chanting the Buddha-name. The sound of his chanting awakened my memories of my grandmother. It was as if I had suddenly woken up from a dream within that space, and I wept bitterly. I felt such deep regret—regret for having abandoned chanting for the sake of my family, and for having been so attached to my son's leg that my spirit became a prosthetic device. I felt so ashamed, and I began to chant the Buddha-name aloud with all my might.

The moment I chanted the sacred name of Namo Amituofo, my spirit was saved. I was released from the space of the prosthetic leg and immediately brought before the Yama King of the hells. The Yama King showed me my own delusion and my foolish attachment to worldly emotions. However, he also praised me for having maintained a kind heart throughout my life. He noted that even after death, whether I was attached to my son or to others, my intention remained the same: to help those with disabilities so they could receive the best possible support. I even had a strong thought at the time: if I could help many people by being a prosthetic leg, I was willing to do so.

It was that very intention—a truly selfless one—that gave me the opportunity to escape the space of the prosthetic leg and eventually earn the position of a prison guard."

From Prison Guard to the Western Pure Land

"Even while serving as a prison guard, I never forgot to chant. Perhaps it was because of this persistent chanting that I was given the chance to hear Practitioner Su giving Dharma talks. You cannot imagine how happy I was the moment I heard Practitioner Su. I took the teachings completely into my heart and shared them with the other prison guards as well. Not long ago, the Yama King sent word that I had been placed on the list to be guided by Practitioner Su to the Western Land of Ultimate Bliss. I shouted with joy, my heart filled with immense gratitude.

Today, I have truly arrived at the Western Land of Ultimate Bliss. My heart is so pure, so incredibly pure, and it is overflowing with gratitude. I am grateful for the compassion of the Buddha. I am grateful for the compassion of Practitioner Su.

Namo Amituofo.

Hua Meijuan"