The Illusion of Everlasting Spring

This is a record of an interview with Mu Changchun, who sought Chao Du at the Hsiang Kuang Pure Land Buddhist Centre in Australia. He now resides in the Western Land of Dharma Nature. This account reflects upon his life approximately 375 years ago. Recorded by the chief writer, Shi Fa, on August 5, 2019.

Mu Changchun speaks:

"Namo Amituofo. I am Mu Changchun. I was sitting under a great tree with my dear friend, Xixia. We were both holding fans, gently fanning ourselves against the heat. I turned to him and asked, 'Xixia, tell me—is it truly possible to be like my name? To be ever-springing, never aging, and never defeated by time?' Xixia continued to fan himself, his expression thoughtful, before he replied, 'That is a difficult thing to achieve, my friend.' I pressed him, 'Why do you say that?' He answered, 'No person remains in the peak of their youth forever, just as no flower stays in full bloom for a hundred days. The affairs of this world are governed by impermanence. How can one expect to never wither or fail? Even the greenest leaves eventually turn yellow and fall. How can you claim to be like an everlasting spring?' I looked at him and said, 'My name is Changchun—Everlasting Spring. It is not merely a label; it carries a profound meaning. If it were impossible to attain such a state, why would my parents have bestowed this name upon me?' Xixia burst into laughter, 'If that is your logic, then if I were named Longevity, would that mean I could live forever and never face death? Stop joking! That is nothing but nonsense, let us speak of it no more.'"

A Name and a Promise

"Xixia and I were the closest of friends for many years. Our parents were long-time business partners, and our two families were the wealthiest and most respected in the entire town. Our parents would often sigh together, lamenting, 'It is such a pity that we both only have sons. If one of us had been blessed with a daughter, our families would have been united by marriage long ago!' Since it was impossible for our generation to be joined in such a way, our parents pinned all their hopes on our future children. They constantly prayed that Xixia and I would marry early and provide them with grandchildren, hoping that if we both had a son and a daughter, the two families could finally become in-laws through our children.

My parents gave me a handsome face, and Xixia was equally dashing—a truly elegant young gentleman. Whenever we walked together, the women in town were invariably captivated by us. I loved to gallop on my white horse across the open fields, while Xixia preferred his brown horse, riding leisurely behind me. Sometimes we would race or practice archery together. This carefree, leisurely life was all we knew; it was the standard way of life for families of our standing."

The Weight of Youth and Beauty

"As for the women, Xixia had countless admirers. They were all stunning beauties, each one deeply attracted to his handsome features, his refined manners, and his family's vast wealth. Every one of them harboured the secret hope of becoming his legitimate wife. Xixia knew his parents were waiting for him to choose a bride, but he could never settle his heart; he went through women as quickly as the seasons changed.

My own romantic life, however, was entirely different. Among all the women I encountered, I loved only one: Fu Wei. We met by chance at a gathering, and it was love at first sight. From that moment, I knew in my heart that she was the only woman I would ever love, and I was determined to marry no one else. For five years, our relationship was steady and deep. We were already discussing the details of our wedding when, just one week before the ceremony, Fu Wei suddenly fell into the river and lost her life. I was devastated. For years, I could not find peace; my heart was constantly tethered to my late fiancée, Fu Wei, but she never returned to me. There were whispers that she had been harmed by others—that local women, jealous of her impending marriage to me, had conspired to make her fall into the river. After her death, her parents moved away from the town. They did not pursue the matter, choosing instead to carry their grief elsewhere. I tried to find them, but they had vanished without a trace. After Fu Wei left, I never spoke of love again, nor did I look at another woman. If my parents had not pressured me to marry, I would have chosen to remain single for the rest of my life. They gave me an ultimatum: I had to be married by the age of twenty-four. I was only seventeen when my mother first made this demand, so I had seven years to prepare, but I felt no urgency at all."

A Heart Locked in the Past

"During those seven years, I often travelled with Xixia. I particularly loved visiting the high mountains to watch the peaks disappear into the white mist. That elusive, half-hidden appearance mirrored my own state of mind. I did not want to reveal myself completely; like the mist, I wrapped my true heart in layers, keeping a private space for myself. It was not that I had dark secrets, but rather that I had given my entire heart to Fu Wei. To everyone else, save for Xixia, I did not know how to be sincere; I always kept a barrier of distance between myself and the world.

Although I only spent five years with Fu Wei, the price I paid for that love was immense. The pain of our separation lasted not just five years, but ten, twenty—it was a wound that never healed. I often locked my heart away, immersing myself in my own thoughts, constantly replaying our past, dreaming of the future we could have had, which had now become nothing more than a cruel fantasy."

The Ghost Island and the Final Vision

"For seven years, Xixia accompanied me as I chased the dreams of my youth. Everything I wanted to do in this life, we accomplished together. We once took the risk of living on a deserted island for nearly three months without ever leaving. That island was known as the 'Ghost Island.' It was said that everyone who had gone there before had met with disaster and died; many skeletons were still scattered there, and ghost fires were often seen at night. This was the legend told by fishermen who passed by the island and saw the eerie lights. We challenged ourselves to go there without bringing any supplies, surviving for three months solely on the plants and natural resources of the island. Unexpectedly, within just a few days, I accidentally ingested a highly toxic plant. I had only lightly licked the juice from a leaf, but the poison surged through my entire body. I began to burn with fever, vomiting uncontrollably, and my skin broke out in itchy rashes. I scratched until I bled, and my neck became severely ulcerated. Several times, I could barely breathe, nearly suffocating to death. Xixia did not know how to save me, and there was no one else on the island to call for help; we had to rely entirely on our own strength. My life was hanging by a thread, yet I felt no fear at all. Xixia saw my calm demeanour and asked, 'Are you not afraid?' At that time, the poison had eroded my throat and vocal cords, and I could no longer speak, but a smile remained on my face. With that smile, I told Xixia, 'I am not afraid.' My reaction surprised him, but my peacefulness helped to soothe his own fear and anxiety. I was not afraid of death because my heart had already followed Fu Wei long ago. Since she was no longer by my side, my heart felt as if it had already died; there was no vitality left, only a shell dragging itself through the human world. Even with Xixia by my side, I was often absent-minded, my heart still yearning for the departed Fu Wei. Now, as I faced death, my mind was filled with her image. It was the first time since her passing that I saw her so clearly, and she did not fade from my sight. Fu Wei was as beautiful as ever; every gesture and expression still captivated me deeply. I listened to her voice—that familiar sound I could never forget—so gentle, so sweet. I lay in Fu Wei's arms, her soft hands gently stroking my face, as if she were telling me, 'Sleep well now.' Faintly, I heard her humming my favourite tune, a melody I knew so well. In that moment, I felt like the happiest man in the world. I closed my eyes tightly, and no matter how Xixia called out to me, I could no longer hear him."