The Illusion of a Golden Life

This is a record of an interview with Luo Han, who sought Chao Du at the Hsiang Kuang Pure Land Buddhist Centre in Australia. He now resides in the Western Land of Ultimate Bliss. This account reflects upon his life approximately 1,851 years ago. Recorded by the chief writer, Shi Fajing, on November 1, 2018.

Luo Han speaks:

"Namo Amituofo. I am Luo Han. Before I was even born, my room was already overflowing with new toys, fine clothes, shoes, and hats. My family had prepared everything for me, as I was the only male grandson of the Luo family. My grandmother had many sons, and my father was the seventh. Despite all their efforts, none of my uncles could produce a son. When my parents married, my mother conceived me immediately, and the entire family waited in breathless anticipation for my arrival. To ensure I would grow up strong and healthy, my grandparents insisted that my mother eat constantly from the moment she became pregnant. They prepared vast amounts of food and tonics every single day, just so that I, in the womb, could absorb every possible nutrient.

It was, perhaps, a bit too much. On the day of my birth, the entire family waited anxiously outside the room. But the labour dragged on and on; I simply could not be born because I was far too large! In the sweltering heat, my family waited outside, some eating fruit to pass the time, others fanning themselves to escape the humidity. Everyone had been waiting for such a long time, desperate to catch even a single glimpse of me.

A Childhood of Endless Excess

Finally, a loud, resonant cry echoed from the room. The entire Luo household seemed to brighten instantly—it was the radiance I had brought with me! Everyone scrambled to crowd into the room, pushing and shoving to see me. My grandmother, despite being the eldest, was the fastest of them all. She snatched me up first, and as she looked at me, tears of joy streamed down her face. She exclaimed, 'It was worth every bit of the effort I put in over these ten months! Hahaha!'

Every day, I was dressed in new clothes; I would wear an outfit once and then give it away to the neighbour's child. I would play with a toy once, and then it would be gifted to someone else. The immense wealth of the Luo family meant that everything I ate and everything I used was brand new, every single day.

When I reached the age for schooling, my mother arranged for my education, but I had no interest in books. I learned the basic characters from my father, but I refused to study further. I only wanted to play in the streets with the other children. I was the 'king of children,' and everyone loved to play with me because I could do everything. My heavy frame was surprisingly agile; I could climb trees with ease, dive into ponds to swim, and outrun the local dogs. I played ball, practised archery, rode horses, and competed in chess, martial arts, and painting. Aside from reading, I was interested in everything, capable of everything, and I played at everything. Every day was spectacular, and I was filled with endless joy!

The Hollow Pursuit of Worldly Desires

By the age of thirteen, I had already begun taking girlfriends, replacing them one after another the moment the novelty wore off. If one were to look past my obesity, my handsome face and prominent family background made it incredibly easy to attract partners. Beyond my romantic pursuits, I travelled everywhere, wandering through mountains and rivers. Every day, I lived as freely and unconstrained as a wandering cloud.

When I reached the age of twenty-six, I suddenly stopped all my indulgences. These twenty-six years of life had allowed me to fully experience what a 'vain life' truly was—and in the end, it was nothing more than that. What people in this world are most obsessed with is nothing more than wealth, lust, fame, food, and sleep. I had grown up lying on a bed of gold, and by thirteen, I was already chasing after women. With the Luo family name, there was not a single person in the entire town who did not know who I was. As for food, I had enjoyed every imaginable delicacy; I had access to things others could only dream of. This was the blessing I had brought with me from birth—I had an endless appetite and the means to satisfy it. As for sleep, no one dared to disturb me, no matter how long I slept, because I was the young master of the Luo family, the only grandson. I did whatever I pleased, and no one could stop me.

Everyone looked at me and said I had come into this world just to play at life. I told them, 'They are absolutely right. For these twenty-six years, I have indeed been playing with my life! But I have also been contemplating: what is life, really?' At twenty-six, I saw through the vanity of existence. I let go of everything. I stopped the feasting, the playing, and the chasing of women. I walked into a temple alone and told the master, 'Please, shave my head.'

The Turning Point: Renunciation

In truth, I had met a monk when I was seven years old. Back then, I had asked him, 'What kind of person can become a monk?' The monk told me, 'Someone who is willing to let go of all worldly desires.' I asked, 'What desires exist in this world?' He replied, 'Whatever you want to do right now is a desire. Different ages bring different desires. These desires will obstruct your practice. If you truly decide to become a monk, you must see through this world and let go of everything. If you walk the path of renunciation without having truly let go of worldly desires, not only will your practice be short-lived, but you will never be able to truly resolve to deliver sentient beings.' Watching the monk walk away, I made a decision in my heart: that back, that silhouette, was exactly who I wanted to become.

From that day on, I lived my life to the fullest, exploring why this world could be so bewitching to the human heart. For nearly twenty years, I played at everything I could, and I did everything I could. I realised that the world is just like that! I realised how exhausting it is to pursue and satisfy one's desires. Why must life be subjected to these illusory temptations, making one suffer so much? I was determined to walk the path of renunciation. To me, other than saving people, there was no other meaning to living in this world. If I were forced to return to those twenty-six years, I would rather die than live that life again. What seemed like enjoying life was, in reality, living torture. For years, my family thought I had gone astray, but just as they were about to give up on me, I announced my decision to become a monk. Without a moment's hesitation, they all nodded in agreement—they were absolutely in favour!

A Life Dedicated to Deliverance

Once I entered the temple to practise, no one was more at ease than I, because I had already seen through everything in this world. I had no path of retreat; my life was dedicated to diligent practice to deliver sentient beings, and then to single-mindedly seek rebirth in the Western Land of Ultimate Bliss. I chose to let go—to let go of worldly dust, to let go of all my personality traits and habits. Whenever my master pointed out where I needed to change, I would find the root of those habits and earnestly eradicate them. If I were to hold onto those traits, it would mean I wanted to continue reincarnating in the six realms of existence, and that was not what I wanted. To escape this world, I used every method to remove the bad habits within me, until I cultivated myself to be as bright and clear as the Buddha's body.

My path of practice was not easier than others, but I had more perseverance. The difference lay in this 'heart of renunciation.' I did not just seek my own liberation; I hoped to help all sentient beings escape this world, for it is truly not worth lingering in. Everyone is deceived by the illusions of this world, not knowing that in the end, it is all nothing left. It is better to see through the world early and seek rebirth in the Western Land.

I have offered this physical body to the dust of the universe. So many sentient beings are waiting to be saved; I do as much as I can. I have never once complained of fatigue, because there is nothing more exhausting than living in this world. To be able to use this body to help sentient beings is such a precious thing; no matter how much I do, I never feel tired. I have done my utmost to save immeasurable sentient beings, and through my own ability, I have achieved rebirth in the Western Land of Ultimate Bliss.

Opening the Spaces of Samsara

I follow Practitioner Su and the immeasurable, boundless Great Bhikshus as we perform Chao Du throughout the universe. Different spaces are opened layer by layer. Every day is a wonderful day for the universe, because every day, immeasurable sentient beings are reborn in the Western Land.

I open the spaces that have karmic affinity with me. Within those spaces, there are even more spaces. All the sentient beings are still inside, performing the exact actions they were doing the moment they entered that space; they do not even know they have entered a space. A single 'Namo Amituofo' opens the space, and I lead the immeasurable beings out of it. All sentient beings are led into these spaces by their desires and habits. If people cannot see this false world clearly, they will be deceived by their own false bodies. In the end, they lead themselves into these spaces, and they lead themselves to suffer the retribution. There is nothing in this world worth investing one's emotions in. Only by detaching early can one be liberated early. Namo Amituofo."

This interview was recorded by the Buddhist disciple Shi Fajing.