The Inner Battle of Koo Chung-ling
An Interview with Koo Chung-ling
Recorded on October 30, 2018
Koo Chung-ling, who sought spiritual deliverance at the Hsiang Kuang Buddhist Centre in Australia, shares his profound reflections on the duality of his existence. Currently residing in Taiwan, he recounts the intense internal battle between his spiritual aspirations and the persistent pull of worldly desires. This interview was recorded on October 30, 2018, and documented by the chief writer, Shi Faxin.
Koo Chung-ling speaks:
"Namo Amituofo. Today, I found myself in a conversation with the left side of my face, for there are two distinct voices echoing within my heart. One voice is like a person throwing stones at me, urging me to wake up from my slumber. The other voice is like a tempter, holding out cotton candy to lure me into following my base desires. When my spirit first returned to my body, I could clearly see that this 'cotton candy' was not something I truly desired; it was merely a manifestation of deceptive illusions."
The Duality of Desire and
"Beyond the sweetness of the cotton candy, there were flashes of the world's economic arteries, the flickering numbers of financial markets, and the images of women—all appearing in rapid succession. These visions were designed to stir the deepest cravings within my heart and pull me back into the cycle of samsara. While some of these desires are indeed things I have enjoyed in the past, others are clearly traps set by my own . At that moment, I had a defensive mechanism deep within my heart: the Buddha-name, Namo Amituofo. The power of this Buddha-name acted like a stone, shattering those worldly distractions into pieces. This was the internal battle that raged the moment my spirit returned to my body."
The Defeat of the Physical Self
"I was able to endure this internal war for quite some time, successfully resisting the images that tried to lure me while I dreamt. I felt that my spirit was being well-protected by the ancestral masters and the protectors. It felt as though I had been given a special mission, and thus my spirit was under special care. However, as soon as my physical body fully awakened, the situation changed. I found myself reaching for the 'cotton candy' again. I stared unblinkingly at the financial news boards and lingered too long on the sight of women. My spirit could no longer be the master; it became faint and powerless within , to the point where I could barely hear its voice, or perhaps it had already been struck down. I lost. Today, I, Koo Chung-ling, saw that my physical body had suffered a total defeat."
A New Mission
"It turns out that I, Koo Chung-ling, am also a person whose desires are as tall as my own body. I am encouraging myself to look at the good rather than the bad, and today, my greatest breakthrough was seeing the truth of my own physical existence. I am not a bad person, but my body is still that of a worldly being, existing in a worldly environment. My spirit knows there is no turning back. Even though I have discovered the truth about my physical form, I must continue to strive. The help that the Master has given me is something I must eventually pay forward to others. This is the basic duty of being human, and it is the mission the Master has entrusted to me. In the past, there was always a voice in my heart telling me to be a 'useless' person, because living as a 'useful' person is far too exhausting. Now, however, I want to be someone who saves others. A boundless energy has been ignited within my heart to face the obstacles of my physical reality. Namo Amituofo."
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About the Author
Hsiang Kuang Pure Land Buddhist Centre
Contributed to Pure Land Buddhism knowledge library