From the Darkness of Hell to the Lotus Seat

This is a record of an interview with Lay Practitioner Mao Bihe, who sought deliverance at the Hsiang Kuang Pure Land Buddhist Centre in Australia. She now resides in the Western Land of Ultimate Bliss. This account reflects upon her transition from the cycle of being reincarnated to the Western Pure Land. Recorded by the chief writer, Shi Fajing, on December 13, 2024.

Lay Practitioner Mao Bihe speaks:

"Namo Amituofo. I, Bihe, kneel sincerely before the Buddha to offer my prostrations. I am filled with a profound sense of gratitude. I am not a person who is skilled with words, but my heart is truly overflowing with thankfulness. I am grateful to Namo Amituofo, I am grateful to Practitioner Su, and I am grateful to everyone who has helped me, especially my child.

The Hidden Suffering of a Soul

In truth, I had been suffering the consequences of my past actions in the hells for a very long time. Because I was prone to negative thoughts and because my karmic creditors would not let me go, I was trapped. People looking at me in the human world might have thought I was still alive, still breathing, but in reality, my soul was already enduring unimaginable torment.

I did not even realise that I was undergoing karmic retribution. My physical health deteriorated year after year, and by the time the illness was finally diagnosed, it was already far too late. I had been suffering for a very long time without knowing the cause.

A Life of Unspoken Anguish

It was bitter! It was truly bitter! There was not a single day when my heart was not filled with suffering. When I was alive, I did not even understand what I was suffering for. My heart felt perpetually stifled, and I had no desire to speak to anyone. I lived without a shred of happiness, and I did not even know what happiness felt like.

When a person’s body and mind are suppressed for so long, it is only natural that illness will manifest. Many times, I just wanted to die quickly so that I could find some relief, so that I would not have to endure such torture. It was so painful. But when I finally did pass away, I discovered that death was even more agonising. I wept incessantly in the hells. No matter how I cried or how I screamed, there was no opportunity for salvation. I was terrified, and there was no one who could save me. I did not know how long I would have to endure such suffering; I remained trapped in the darkness, unable to see even a glimmer of light.

The Golden Light of Deliverance

Not long ago, I suddenly saw a golden light appear before me in the depths of that dark hell. In an instant, I heard someone calling my name. I was not sure if it was truly me they were calling, but I had a powerful, overwhelming intuition that it was indeed me. Before I could even do anything, I was swiftly brought out of the hells.

It was Practitioner Su who rescued my spirit from hell and placed me upon a lotus seat within the Western Land of Dharma Nature. I never imagined that such a thing could happen. At first, my mind was not yet clear; I felt lost and bewildered, and the experience felt so surreal.

Awakening and Repentance

Every day, the Buddha-light has been purifying me, and I have been listening very earnestly to the Dharma talks given by Practitioner Su. Gradually, my spirit became clearer and clearer, and only then did my heart finally find peace.

About a day or two ago, I looked back at my past and saw the sheer volume of karma I had created. I was so terrified, and I felt such deep, profound repentance! All those karmic creditors whom I had harmed so deeply were still searching for me, but they could no longer find me. I truly hope that they can all be received by the Buddha and no longer suffer. I am so sorry for what I did to them. I beg for their forgiveness, and I pray that the Buddha will save them and help them leave their suffering behind.

I do not know what else to say; I do not have many words. I sincerely thank Practitioner Su, I thank everyone at the Hsiang Kuang Pure Land Buddhist Centre, and I thank my child for helping me so that I do not have to be reincarnated again, so that I do not have to suffer anymore.

Namo Amituofo."

Mao Bihe bows in reverence.